By Eileen Brown
An example of the Golden Rule runs like a thread through the life of PEGGY MILLER-STEPHENS, a woman who worked for 32 years to better the lives of her brothers and sisters in uniform. She retired from federal service in 2004.
Since then, her life began to change in ways she could not have imagined. Like bread cast upon the waters, her kindness to others over the years was coming back to her.
Let’s go back to the time when her late father, WILFRED MILLER, also working in Civil Service, took his family to Adak, Alaska. Peggy fell in love with her high school sweetheart, RAY STEPHENS. “Our first date was my senior prom,” she said.
Timing was off, however. Ray, AN E3 in the U.S. Navy, took orders to California. He went on by himself in 1971. Peggy remained in Adak to work and in 1972 started her career in Civil Service. Their engagement ended, but not their love.
Years passed and she was recognized many times for her job performance in such departments at Whidbey Naval Air Station as Air Operations, Public Works and Naval Hospital. She served at Housing for 22 years, a job she absolutely loved.
“People would come in looking for housing and sometimes, if they were on a list for long, I got to know them. I love helping people.”
In a way, she is still helping people who need assistance in her job as administrative assistant to Pastor David Lura at the First United Methodist Church. She was singing in the choir one Sunday and whispered to her friend BETTY JO SHADDY-BROWN that she’d really like to work for the church. Some time later, the church needed a secretary in the front office, she went for the interview and got the job.
“It was my first week at work and I needed to find a particular scripture to put in the church bulletin,” Peggy recalled. “There was a Bible on my desk that ELAINE JUNG, the retiring secretary, said had been sitting there for years but no one knew whose Bible it was. I opened the cover and saw it was the one I had donated in memory of my mother.”
After her father’s death in October 2000, Peggy received an email from her old Navy sweetheart. Peggy and Ray realized through emails and calls they still felt the same and now might be the perfect time to try again. They met up again in 2001, 30 years since they said goodbye in Adak. Ray moved to Oak Harbor from Kansas in 2002 and they married in 2004. He now works at Lumbermen’s in Coupeville.
“It’s like my best friend is back,” Peggy said with a broad smile. “In fact, Pastor David married us on a boat named Mystic Sea in Bowman Bay. It was July and everything was perfect.”
Today, Peggy gives thanks for the more than 450 parishioners she considers her family. She still gives without thought of reward, living by the fundamental moral principle, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you…”
Grief is natural part of living
There is an event coming up this Saturday, Feb. 9, at Trinity Lutheran Church in Freeland. It’s for everyone who has lost someone they loved, so I guess that covers us all.
Whidbey General Hospital, MAC/Oncology and Home Health Care and Hospice give this sixth annual “Remembrances of the Heart” as a gift of comfort to those who grieve.
PATTY NORMAN had the opportunity to attend last year. “It was just February and I was pretty raw after my husband RAY passed away the previous November, in 2006,” she said.
“It’s for anyone on a grieving journey and it was such a supporting service for me.
“I told some of my friends and they had never heard about such a lovely thing. There is not much chance to share our grief.”
Norman said her two daughters went with her. “It was a beautiful opportunity to share with others who absolutely know where you are,” Patty said.
Music and guest speakers are respectful of their audience. If you wish to share, a remembrance table will be reserved for a photo of your loved one or a memorial card.
Providence Hospital Chaplain Donna Vande Kief will speak. There will also be a lighting of candles.
Trish Rose, public information officer for Whidbey General Hospital, said, “This is a memorial for and a celebration of the special people we have lost but hold close in our hearts. The gathering provides a time and place for friends and families to honor their loved ones with a program that is both informational and inspirational.”
Trinity Lutheran is at 1508 E. Hwy. 525 in Freeland. The program begins at 1:30 p.m. Feb. 9.
If you plan to attend, please RSVP to 678-7605 or 360-321-6659; if you are not attending but still wish your loved one’s name acknowledged, call Colleen Lura or Carla Jolley at 678-7605.
Sometimes we feel stuck on our individual grieving journey. To understand your own grief, listen to the stories of others like you. Saturday’s service can give you strength to continue.
As Patty concluded, “We grieve for what wasn’t as much as for what we had.” At least we don’t have to grieve alone.
