I feel one segment of American life is grossly overlooked. The military wife. I do not know the story of the military husband (female is in the service, male is civilian). Or, where husband and wife are military members. But I would guess that the story is about the same.
In the time I have been associated with the United States military I have known wives came from about every one of the 50 states. They came from hills of Tennessee, plains of Texas, sunshine of Florida, and cool Alaska.
I have known wives from 25 to 30 different countries. Some were children under the sound of the Nazi jack boots marching, and the sound of Allied bombers. They all ended up with a common task. They were U.S. military wives.
Being a military wife is not an easy job. I am addressing Air Force events as that is where I spent the bulk of my time, but my views can be retold with an Army, Navy or Marine Corps setting. The military job calls on the husband at all hours of the day and night, leaving the wife with the task of getting the kids up in the morning, dressed, fed and off to schools, all by herself. Then she must enter into her own world, doing all the chores of a housewife, or going off to her own job. After school it is getting the kids to little league baseball, football, soccer, swimming, dance class, music and then seeing that they do their school homework.
There was the 45 years of the Cold War. A B-36 crew member would kiss his wife good bye at 2 a.m. and two days later comes home to tell the family about his flight that took him from Fort Worth to the coast of California, north to Alaska, over Canada, Greenland, Cuba and then back to Fort Worth. Most of the flights were classified so the husband had to say he was on a local hop.
Then the B-52 story. Some of those big boys were airborne 24 hours per day ready for war. On the ground, back-up crews spent days locked behind chain link fences with their bombers and tankers ready. When the alarm went off alert crews raced with their planes and were ready to roll within two minutes. “Looking Glass,” the airborne command post was in the air 24 hours per day, with a general officer and full battle staff ready to take over if the White House and Pentagon were knocked out. Missile silo crews were locked underground for a week, or more.
Any problems at home, the wife had to be a mother, doctor, teacher, chaplain, coach or whatever it took to keep the family going. Then came the report of an accident. You wait, and wait until you get the word that all is OK and your husband is safe. Or not safe when the chaplain and commanding officer come to knock.
Or just as you get settled into a circle of friends, school and church that make life a little enjoyable, orders come to move. Out comes the atlas to find this new home-to-be. Or the husband is being assigned to a remote station. No families allowed. So you look for a place to live. Then comes the job of settling into the new location. About the time that is completed the assignment is up and you start packing to go to the next place.
I have known some women who stayed in one place, following their own career, while the husband did all the moves the military wanted him to make. Most wives followed the career of the husband.
The Army, Navy, Air Force and Marine Corps all differ in deployment and transfer. But the basic problems are the same. The lion’s share of the home and family tasks rest with the wife. I was able to give my full attention to doing my military task while my wife took care of most of the family functions.
Sometimes the problems of combining military life with family life is more than many can overcome. The results are divorce, or separation from the service. But those who stay for a career are special. The military wife was right there. Just a typical military family.
So to the military wife, whom I have known for well more than 50 years, I say thanks for what you have contributed to this country.
Robert D. Brown
Oak Harbor
